Fic: Bitch Please
Sep. 12th, 2011 10:23 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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cottontailsNOTE: This is a repost from the old community of mine. Original post date was June 09, 2011.
Title: Bitch Please
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis
Character(s): John Sheppard, Rodney McKay, Teyla Emmagen, Ronon Dex, Elsa Gutierrez (OFC)
Pairing(s): John Sheppard/OFC
Word Count: About 2300 total
Age Rating: PG
Summary: Written for![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
stargateland writing challenge, This is inspired by 20in20 communities that Im sure some of you are familiar with. The idea is to create 20 icons or drabbles in 20 days on a specific subject using the themes given below. Pick one, stargate related subject (whether it be a person, object, relationship, etc.) and base all of your icons/drabbles on that subject.
Originally it was going to be an icon only challenge, however, I know there are those out there that are not comfortable with graphics; therefore, I am allowing people to make drabbles instead. However, you can not mix and match. You have to choose one or the other.
Now my crazy insane mind has to go and make it harder on myself by working it into one continuous story. This is what the plunnies gave me:
Author Choice – The Set Up:
“Will you let him be for awhile?” Elsa asked, glaring up at McKay as he hounded John about doing work in the chair with him. “I know you like him and have been trying to hit on him, but since he has expressed zero interest in you just leave him alone.”
“What are you talking about? I just need him to do some work in the chair,” Rodney said stealing one of Sheppard's chicken fingers, and getting a glare from the topic of conversation.
The good doctor just looked at him. “Let me tell it to you straight. That is what John is. He is not gay,” she said slowly. “Your attempts at flirting have gone unnoticed and unreturned.”
Teyla and Ronon sat at the team's table watching the match go back and forth between, clearly two people who clearly were interested in the same man.
Accessory:
“And what would make you think that he was wants someone like you? Or any woman?” McKay rambled on.
Standing from her seat, Elsa braced herself as she leaned across the table challengingly. “Let's just say, I'm the purse for his dick, and have been for the last five months...”
At that comment, all eyes were on her, including John's – after he finished choking on a french fry. “Elsa!”
“His purse? Why a purse?”
She had a devious grin as she stared at Rodney. “It's all about accessorizing. I'm the real Prada, you would be a knockoff.”
Space:
Rodney stared back at her. “Did you just...”
“She did McKay and if you want to keep your balls attached to your body and her not spacing them on our mission tomorrow, I suggest you walk away,” John replied as he tried to keep from raising his voice too loud. As it was, Elsa just announced to everyone that they had been sleeping together for awhile.
“But...”
“McKay...”
“Fine. When did you two start seeing each other because I swear I would have noticed something!” he asked, feeling a little hurt.
John sighed. “When we were coming back from that mission and the Jumper stalled and we were stranded around the space gate. Have been since. Now will you drop it?”
Rodney grunted and grabbed his tablet before walking off in a huff. It was going to be a long day.
Dreaming:
“You really did not notice his affection for you John?” Teyla asked.
The look he gave her was all of an answer she needed. Elsa, while she did like the man and considered him a friend could not help but roll her eyes. “And he can keep dreaming. He's a good friend and all, but really I just reached my limit now. It's like he can just walk in and demand his time without consideration for the possibility that John might have other plans.”
“You didn't have to be a bitch about it though,” Sheppard pointed out.
“I'll apologize to him later, I promise,” she said as she picked and pinched at her own fries. “I know I just squashed his dream, but having mine come true after nearly seven years of wondering what if...”
Black & White:
Ronon looked at the two and shook his head. “It's not all that black and white,” he said after remaining silent until then. “McKay had a thing for as long as I could remember.”
“Believe me I know,” Elsa repeated. “After he calms down – and I get a lot of chocolate on my next personal order to make it up to him, I'll figure something out.”
“John? Are you alright?” Teyla asked.
“Yeah, I'm fine. Was it really that obvious?” he asked.
They all grinned at him. “Like black and white cookies.”
Hair:
“But I still don't get it,” John said.
“It's gotta be the hair,” Elsa replied. “I know it just makes me want to...”
“Yeah I know what it makes you want to do and don't say another word!” he said quickly, looking at her.
She simply grinned back at him as she reached across to play with some of the locks that were sticking out to the one side that day.
Teyla laughed so hard that Ronon had to pass her his glass of tea. “I do know that the women that come to my classes have commented about it. It seems to be quite popular.”
“Oh for crying out loud!”
Hero:
“Or the hero worship? The nurses are always swooning whenever he comes in after saving the day,” Elsa teased.
John glared at her. “Don't you start.”
“What happened?” Ronon asked, curious already.
The man dropped his head to the table groaning. “What is this? Pick on Sheppard Day?”
“You know Nurse Critsher? Every time, she has to make sure she is on duty when you guys come back from a mission. She loves treating her hero. Of course its because she just wants to get her hands on his body for the exams and blood tests.”
Friends:
“Some friends you are,” John complained.
Elsa pushed over her pudding cup as if it were a peace keeper, which he did accept and devour.
“We only tease you because we love you,” Teyla smiled warmly. “If we did not, we all would end up like that scientist your first year here. Kavanaugh?”
“Oh god!” John moaned.
Ronon couldn't help but make that extra jab. “Of course Teyla and I don't love you the way Elsa and McKay does...”
“That's it. You're on babysitting duty with Lorne,” their leader said with a finality that he was done joking around.
Uniform:
“Actually,” Elsa said, looking thoughtful as she eyed him again.
“Don't. Just please,” he begged.
She smiled and leaned on her arm. “I personally am more for the uniform. Especially after your dirty, multiday missions. You come back all hot and sexy.”
John just stared at her. What am I going to do?! he wondered, recognizing the look in her eyes. Yep. I'm done for tonight. My cock is not my own anymore.
“Would you like some time alone with my uniform? I'm sure it smelling like me would help you get off enough to give me a night's rest,” he tried.
Circle:
Elsa smiled at him as she stood to clear her tray. Coming back past the table before she returned to work, she looked at him and whispered in his ear.
“I have a new outfit that just came in my last order – just for you,” she said before standing straight. “I'll just go check on Rodney. Make sure things are kosher. I'll see you later.”
“What does that mean?” Ronon asked as he stole the last piece of chicken from John.
“Kosher? Phrase. Make sure things are good between them. You know, it's like they just came full circle since they first met. You remember when they met?”
“I did suspect that Rodney felt threatened by her. At least we truly know and confirmed why,” Teyla sighed.
Home:
John shrugged. “He'll get over it. Eventually they will have to get along because Atlantis is our home and not just his toy to play with. Believe me. I knew her long before you guys. She's mellowed out here.”
Ronon didn't believe it and the look on his face said so.
“Really! Have you seen her throw anything at anyone – nevermind. Forget I said that.”
Of course she threw things. It was how people knew who she was pissed at the most and for a doctor, she had really good aim.
“She went on about my not going for treatment, threw Teyla's stick at me, then made me go get stitched up by her after she just split my head open,” he said.
“I said forget I said anything,” John said, making a face.
Embarrassment:
Shrugging Ronon didn't really care. “Whatever. She's got an arm.”
“Yeah, I know,” Sheppard replied as he rubbed the back of his neck. “You know, she's worse than a guy sometimes. The way she comes out with things. Did she really need to announce it like that?”
“You're the one sleeping with her.”
John narrowed his eyes. “Yes, I know that. Thanks for pointing out the obvious.”
“Perhaps that is why you are attracted to her? Elsa speaks what she thinks and feels?” Teyla suggested.
“Well, that was how she got my attention when we first met...”
Fear:
“How was that?” Ronon asked.
Sheppard sat back and thought about it. “It was after I got my ass hauled out of the desert – you remember that story. She was one of the field docs that worked on us. I swear she had all the men on their knees with her ranting and barking orders. Elsa knows how to command in the field and we knew to shut up and listen otherwise we'd be stuck with the largest needles she had in her arsenal.”
“Yep. She is good at scaring her patients,” the Satedan agreed, rubbing his arm absentmindedly.
Jealousy:
On her way back to the infirmary, Elsa stopped by Rodney's lab. Knocking on his door, she watched and waited for him to give his okay for her to come in.
“What do you want?” he asked as he walked passed to do something at one of his projects.
“Can't I come visit my friend? We are still friends, right?” she asked carefully.
He let out a laugh and continued to move about the room. “If it were so obvious what I felt, then why didn't you say something sooner?”
“Why doesn't John speak of a lot of things, especially his past?” Elsa pointed out.
Rodney had to give her that.
Compassion:
She frowned and leaned against the door frame. “Anyway, I just wanted to say I was sorry. I shouldn't have said what I said, the way I said it.”
He pretended he wasn't listening but he knew that it took a lot for this woman to apologize. In that they were very much alike.
“He's my my best friend,” he replied, not willing to look at her yet. “Just don't hurt him.”
“Believe me, I don't want to see him hurt by anybody any more than you do,” Elsa said with hope that her already delicate friendship with him was okay.
Understanding:
McKay nodded slowly as he looked at her. It was as if he was trying to see exactly how sincere she was. He had always suspected that there was something between Sheppard and her, but it wasn't until that day he really understood it.
They were like the ying and yang to each other. He could see that, in how they were together and how they much his friend had changed since her arrival – and it was for the better.
“I know John's been how you would say, happy? If, um, he's happy with being with you, then I can be happy for him,” he eventually said.
Elsa nodded with a smile. “Thank you.”
Author Choice – Discomfort:
After John finished his lunch, and his friends ragging on him, he had to check in with Rodney. How that talk would go, it was anyone's guess. He headed into the lab with his hands in his pockets and a bit of a sheepish look on his face.
“Elsa already apologized,” McKay said, getting straight to the point.
“Wow. That was quick, even for her,” John replied surprised.
Rodney looked at him unsure of anything else to say. “So...you and Elsa...”
“Yep. Look, it's nothing personal. You're like my brother, my best friend...”
“I know. It's okay, really.”
“Are you sure?” John asked, worried.
Author Choice – Chocolate:
Rodney nodded. “Yeah. I mean I told Elsa that if she hurt you, I would have to get Ronon to give me fighting lessons so that I could kick her butt but then I realized that I could probably just kill the air settings in her quarters. Of course she pointed out that if I did that, she would just end up moving into the infirmary and then always be hovering around whenever I needed to talk to Carson.”
John stared at him with lost confusion, but didn't care. “Oh. That's – good.”
“Then she said she'd probably space herself for hurting you and then she was alright with me. Well after she said she would give me her entire stock of those Lindor chocolate balls she keeps stashed in her office...”
Author Choice – Children:
Sheppard couldn't help but laugh. It was actually him that got her hooked on those things when he bought her a bag for Valentine's Day the year they split.
“Then I told her if you two ever had children, at least one has to be named after me,” McKay said, throwing John that curve ball.
Choking back a cough, he looked at him. “What?! I think you're getting a little ahead of yourself. She and I only just started getting seeing each other again...”
“What? It's not like pregnancies are always planned. Look at Teyla!” Rodney replied innocently.
Author Choice – Bitch Please:
John had to shake himself from the thought of Elsa getting pregnant. No way in hell was he ready for that right now. “Well I wanted to make sure that you, well both of you were still alive after all that.”
“Why wouldn't we be?” McKay asked confused as fuck.
“Well, let's just say that I had a crazy vision of you two slapping each other in a bitch fight – no offense,” he explained.
The scientist actually was amused. “Would that have you know, turned you on?”
“Jesus Rodney! I didn't need THAT in my head!”
Title: Bitch Please
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis
Character(s): John Sheppard, Rodney McKay, Teyla Emmagen, Ronon Dex, Elsa Gutierrez (OFC)
Pairing(s): John Sheppard/OFC
Word Count: About 2300 total
Age Rating: PG
Summary: Written for
stargateland writing challenge, This is inspired by 20in20 communities that Im sure some of you are familiar with. The idea is to create 20 icons or drabbles in 20 days on a specific subject using the themes given below. Pick one, stargate related subject (whether it be a person, object, relationship, etc.) and base all of your icons/drabbles on that subject. Originally it was going to be an icon only challenge, however, I know there are those out there that are not comfortable with graphics; therefore, I am allowing people to make drabbles instead. However, you can not mix and match. You have to choose one or the other.
Now my crazy insane mind has to go and make it harder on myself by working it into one continuous story. This is what the plunnies gave me:
Author Choice – The Set Up:
“Will you let him be for awhile?” Elsa asked, glaring up at McKay as he hounded John about doing work in the chair with him. “I know you like him and have been trying to hit on him, but since he has expressed zero interest in you just leave him alone.”
“What are you talking about? I just need him to do some work in the chair,” Rodney said stealing one of Sheppard's chicken fingers, and getting a glare from the topic of conversation.
The good doctor just looked at him. “Let me tell it to you straight. That is what John is. He is not gay,” she said slowly. “Your attempts at flirting have gone unnoticed and unreturned.”
Teyla and Ronon sat at the team's table watching the match go back and forth between, clearly two people who clearly were interested in the same man.
Accessory:
“And what would make you think that he was wants someone like you? Or any woman?” McKay rambled on.
Standing from her seat, Elsa braced herself as she leaned across the table challengingly. “Let's just say, I'm the purse for his dick, and have been for the last five months...”
At that comment, all eyes were on her, including John's – after he finished choking on a french fry. “Elsa!”
“His purse? Why a purse?”
She had a devious grin as she stared at Rodney. “It's all about accessorizing. I'm the real Prada, you would be a knockoff.”
Space:
Rodney stared back at her. “Did you just...”
“She did McKay and if you want to keep your balls attached to your body and her not spacing them on our mission tomorrow, I suggest you walk away,” John replied as he tried to keep from raising his voice too loud. As it was, Elsa just announced to everyone that they had been sleeping together for awhile.
“But...”
“McKay...”
“Fine. When did you two start seeing each other because I swear I would have noticed something!” he asked, feeling a little hurt.
John sighed. “When we were coming back from that mission and the Jumper stalled and we were stranded around the space gate. Have been since. Now will you drop it?”
Rodney grunted and grabbed his tablet before walking off in a huff. It was going to be a long day.
Dreaming:
“You really did not notice his affection for you John?” Teyla asked.
The look he gave her was all of an answer she needed. Elsa, while she did like the man and considered him a friend could not help but roll her eyes. “And he can keep dreaming. He's a good friend and all, but really I just reached my limit now. It's like he can just walk in and demand his time without consideration for the possibility that John might have other plans.”
“You didn't have to be a bitch about it though,” Sheppard pointed out.
“I'll apologize to him later, I promise,” she said as she picked and pinched at her own fries. “I know I just squashed his dream, but having mine come true after nearly seven years of wondering what if...”
Black & White:
Ronon looked at the two and shook his head. “It's not all that black and white,” he said after remaining silent until then. “McKay had a thing for as long as I could remember.”
“Believe me I know,” Elsa repeated. “After he calms down – and I get a lot of chocolate on my next personal order to make it up to him, I'll figure something out.”
“John? Are you alright?” Teyla asked.
“Yeah, I'm fine. Was it really that obvious?” he asked.
They all grinned at him. “Like black and white cookies.”
Hair:
“But I still don't get it,” John said.
“It's gotta be the hair,” Elsa replied. “I know it just makes me want to...”
“Yeah I know what it makes you want to do and don't say another word!” he said quickly, looking at her.
She simply grinned back at him as she reached across to play with some of the locks that were sticking out to the one side that day.
Teyla laughed so hard that Ronon had to pass her his glass of tea. “I do know that the women that come to my classes have commented about it. It seems to be quite popular.”
“Oh for crying out loud!”
Hero:
“Or the hero worship? The nurses are always swooning whenever he comes in after saving the day,” Elsa teased.
John glared at her. “Don't you start.”
“What happened?” Ronon asked, curious already.
The man dropped his head to the table groaning. “What is this? Pick on Sheppard Day?”
“You know Nurse Critsher? Every time, she has to make sure she is on duty when you guys come back from a mission. She loves treating her hero. Of course its because she just wants to get her hands on his body for the exams and blood tests.”
Friends:
“Some friends you are,” John complained.
Elsa pushed over her pudding cup as if it were a peace keeper, which he did accept and devour.
“We only tease you because we love you,” Teyla smiled warmly. “If we did not, we all would end up like that scientist your first year here. Kavanaugh?”
“Oh god!” John moaned.
Ronon couldn't help but make that extra jab. “Of course Teyla and I don't love you the way Elsa and McKay does...”
“That's it. You're on babysitting duty with Lorne,” their leader said with a finality that he was done joking around.
Uniform:
“Actually,” Elsa said, looking thoughtful as she eyed him again.
“Don't. Just please,” he begged.
She smiled and leaned on her arm. “I personally am more for the uniform. Especially after your dirty, multiday missions. You come back all hot and sexy.”
John just stared at her. What am I going to do?! he wondered, recognizing the look in her eyes. Yep. I'm done for tonight. My cock is not my own anymore.
“Would you like some time alone with my uniform? I'm sure it smelling like me would help you get off enough to give me a night's rest,” he tried.
Circle:
Elsa smiled at him as she stood to clear her tray. Coming back past the table before she returned to work, she looked at him and whispered in his ear.
“I have a new outfit that just came in my last order – just for you,” she said before standing straight. “I'll just go check on Rodney. Make sure things are kosher. I'll see you later.”
“What does that mean?” Ronon asked as he stole the last piece of chicken from John.
“Kosher? Phrase. Make sure things are good between them. You know, it's like they just came full circle since they first met. You remember when they met?”
“I did suspect that Rodney felt threatened by her. At least we truly know and confirmed why,” Teyla sighed.
Home:
John shrugged. “He'll get over it. Eventually they will have to get along because Atlantis is our home and not just his toy to play with. Believe me. I knew her long before you guys. She's mellowed out here.”
Ronon didn't believe it and the look on his face said so.
“Really! Have you seen her throw anything at anyone – nevermind. Forget I said that.”
Of course she threw things. It was how people knew who she was pissed at the most and for a doctor, she had really good aim.
“She went on about my not going for treatment, threw Teyla's stick at me, then made me go get stitched up by her after she just split my head open,” he said.
“I said forget I said anything,” John said, making a face.
Embarrassment:
Shrugging Ronon didn't really care. “Whatever. She's got an arm.”
“Yeah, I know,” Sheppard replied as he rubbed the back of his neck. “You know, she's worse than a guy sometimes. The way she comes out with things. Did she really need to announce it like that?”
“You're the one sleeping with her.”
John narrowed his eyes. “Yes, I know that. Thanks for pointing out the obvious.”
“Perhaps that is why you are attracted to her? Elsa speaks what she thinks and feels?” Teyla suggested.
“Well, that was how she got my attention when we first met...”
Fear:
“How was that?” Ronon asked.
Sheppard sat back and thought about it. “It was after I got my ass hauled out of the desert – you remember that story. She was one of the field docs that worked on us. I swear she had all the men on their knees with her ranting and barking orders. Elsa knows how to command in the field and we knew to shut up and listen otherwise we'd be stuck with the largest needles she had in her arsenal.”
“Yep. She is good at scaring her patients,” the Satedan agreed, rubbing his arm absentmindedly.
Jealousy:
On her way back to the infirmary, Elsa stopped by Rodney's lab. Knocking on his door, she watched and waited for him to give his okay for her to come in.
“What do you want?” he asked as he walked passed to do something at one of his projects.
“Can't I come visit my friend? We are still friends, right?” she asked carefully.
He let out a laugh and continued to move about the room. “If it were so obvious what I felt, then why didn't you say something sooner?”
“Why doesn't John speak of a lot of things, especially his past?” Elsa pointed out.
Rodney had to give her that.
Compassion:
She frowned and leaned against the door frame. “Anyway, I just wanted to say I was sorry. I shouldn't have said what I said, the way I said it.”
He pretended he wasn't listening but he knew that it took a lot for this woman to apologize. In that they were very much alike.
“He's my my best friend,” he replied, not willing to look at her yet. “Just don't hurt him.”
“Believe me, I don't want to see him hurt by anybody any more than you do,” Elsa said with hope that her already delicate friendship with him was okay.
Understanding:
McKay nodded slowly as he looked at her. It was as if he was trying to see exactly how sincere she was. He had always suspected that there was something between Sheppard and her, but it wasn't until that day he really understood it.
They were like the ying and yang to each other. He could see that, in how they were together and how they much his friend had changed since her arrival – and it was for the better.
“I know John's been how you would say, happy? If, um, he's happy with being with you, then I can be happy for him,” he eventually said.
Elsa nodded with a smile. “Thank you.”
Author Choice – Discomfort:
After John finished his lunch, and his friends ragging on him, he had to check in with Rodney. How that talk would go, it was anyone's guess. He headed into the lab with his hands in his pockets and a bit of a sheepish look on his face.
“Elsa already apologized,” McKay said, getting straight to the point.
“Wow. That was quick, even for her,” John replied surprised.
Rodney looked at him unsure of anything else to say. “So...you and Elsa...”
“Yep. Look, it's nothing personal. You're like my brother, my best friend...”
“I know. It's okay, really.”
“Are you sure?” John asked, worried.
Author Choice – Chocolate:
Rodney nodded. “Yeah. I mean I told Elsa that if she hurt you, I would have to get Ronon to give me fighting lessons so that I could kick her butt but then I realized that I could probably just kill the air settings in her quarters. Of course she pointed out that if I did that, she would just end up moving into the infirmary and then always be hovering around whenever I needed to talk to Carson.”
John stared at him with lost confusion, but didn't care. “Oh. That's – good.”
“Then she said she'd probably space herself for hurting you and then she was alright with me. Well after she said she would give me her entire stock of those Lindor chocolate balls she keeps stashed in her office...”
Author Choice – Children:
Sheppard couldn't help but laugh. It was actually him that got her hooked on those things when he bought her a bag for Valentine's Day the year they split.
“Then I told her if you two ever had children, at least one has to be named after me,” McKay said, throwing John that curve ball.
Choking back a cough, he looked at him. “What?! I think you're getting a little ahead of yourself. She and I only just started getting seeing each other again...”
“What? It's not like pregnancies are always planned. Look at Teyla!” Rodney replied innocently.
Author Choice – Bitch Please:
John had to shake himself from the thought of Elsa getting pregnant. No way in hell was he ready for that right now. “Well I wanted to make sure that you, well both of you were still alive after all that.”
“Why wouldn't we be?” McKay asked confused as fuck.
“Well, let's just say that I had a crazy vision of you two slapping each other in a bitch fight – no offense,” he explained.
The scientist actually was amused. “Would that have you know, turned you on?”
“Jesus Rodney! I didn't need THAT in my head!”